• The introduction defines the terms using two sources.

• The writer's main idea is given at the end of the introduction.

• The paragraphs begin with topic or subtopic sentences.

• The writer states his interpretation of each essay.

• The writer uses transitional sentences when moving from discussion of one essay to another.

• Ideas in the topic sentences are supported by evidence quoted from the essays.

• The quotations are integrated into the writer's own sentnces.

• The quotations are documented

• After quoting evidence from the essays, the writer explains how the evidence supports the main idea of the essay.

• The paper has a conclusion.

• The paper has a works cited listing all of the sources quoted in the paper.

The terms “concrete” and “specific” can be best understood by contrasting them with their opposites, “abstract” and “general.” The Little Brown Handbook tells us that “abstract words name qualities and ideas” and that “general words name classes or groups of things” (570). In contrast, words that are concrete name things that can be seen, heard, touched, tasted, or smelled, while specific words “limit a general class” (570).

The American Heritage Dictionary says that what is concrete relates “to an actual, specific thing or instance” and it is particular, “existing in reality or in real experience” ("Concrete"). Thus, what is concrete is really there and you can stump your toe on it or smell it burning. This same dictionary notes that specific means “explicitly set forth; definite” as well as “special, distinctive, or unique” ("Specific"). The terms “concrete” and “specific” are used in tandem because the things these words point to share the common qualities of being real and particular. Beauty is an abstraction; a seashell on the beach is a concrete and specific instance of beauty.

However, it should be noted that while concreteness (outside the realm of theoretical physics) is an absolute quality, meaning that something either exists in a concrete state or does not, specificity is relative. This means that an object pointed to by a word can be considered more or less specific when placed among other related objects. Is the word “dog” general or specific? We would agree that what it designates is concrete because we can see, touch, and smell dogs, and the word is specific if offered as an example of a mammal. But it is less specific than canine, less specific than German Sheppard, and less specific than the German Sheppard with the green collier barking at me.

This is the introduction that defines the terms, “concrete” and “specific” using two sources. The writer goes beyond simply quoting what the sources say, but discusses the meanings of the terms as he understands them. This is an essential first step. By writing about the terms, the author leans what he needs to know in order to apply the terms in an analysis of the essays. At the same time, he is conveying his understanding of the terms to the reader who will now be equipped to follow his discussion.

Concrete and specific language is essential when writers want to create pictures or render actions that illustrate their main idea. Their words are like the brush strokes of a painter, and the authors in this week's reading assignment, Virginia Woolf, E. B. White, and George Orwell, offer good examples of concrete and specific language that appeal to the readers five senses.

This paragraph gives the writer's main idea:

“Concrete and specific language is essential when writers want to create pictures or render actions that illustrate their main idea.”

The last sentence in the paragraph simply refers to the authors of the essays and says that the focus will be on concrete and specific language. This completes the orientation of the reader.

In the first of these essays, “The Death of the Moth,” by Virginia Woolf, the author uses concrete and specific language to contrast the vitality of the English countryside with the death of a common moth. In this essay, Woolf sees the death of the moth as an illustration of the universal dominion of death, the instinctive struggle against death, and inevitable capitulation of every living creature to death.

The first sentence gives orientating information by naming the author and the title of the essay, indicating the topic, and stating its mode of development, i.e. contrast. The last sentence states what the writer sees as Woolf's main idea.

In describing the activities outside her window on a September morning, she says that “the earth was pressed flat and gleamed with moisture” where it had been turned by a plow (57). Here the language is concrete, appealing to both the senses of sight and of touch. Above, the rooks were “soaring round the tree tops until it looked as if a vast net with thousands of black knots in it had been cast up into the air” (57). This is a comparison, a simile, and its impact stems from the vigorous language. The birds are “soaring” and each appears to be a black knot in a net. The scene that emerges is filled with energy and activity.

This paragraph gives two examples of concrete language and documents the quotations. Note how the quoted material is integrated with the writer's own words so that the two form complete, grammatical sentences. Click on this link for infomation on integrating quotations into your writing.

The last sentence of the paragraph states the significance of the description.

Turning her attention from this panorama of vitality, Woolf focuses her attention on a simple moth.

This is a topic sentence that makes a transition from a discussion of Woolf's view beyond the window to her description of the the moth inside.

She calls the moth a “specimen,” a general representative of its type, (note that the words “specific” and “specimen” come from the same Latin root) but she describes him with concrete language. The moth “with his narrow hay-colored wings, fringed with a tassel of the same colour, seemed content with life” (57). The language shows her close observation and presents a detailed picture: The “hay-colored” wings are both “narrow” and “fringed,” creating a visual image and suggesting a tactile sensation with the word “fringed.” Near death, “he slipped from the wooden ledge [of the window pane] and fell, fluttering his wings, on to his back on the window sill” (58). The “wooden ledge” and the “window sill” are concrete objects, and the actions of the moth that “slipped” and then “fell” while “fluttering” its wings are easily visualized. In the end, “The moth having righted himself now lay most decently and uncomplainingly composed” (59). The language is concrete and specific serving to contrast the futile struggle and his final capitulation of the moth with the vigorous activity beyond the window, effectively illustrating the idea that death has dominion.

The topic sentence is followed by selected quotations about the appearance and actions of the moth. The quotations are integrated into the writer's sentences and are documented.

The writer does not just quote examples of concrete and specific language but emphasizes particular words and phrases to show what is important in the quotations.

The paragraph ends by relating Woolf's use of concrete language to the illustration of her main idea.

Another essay that uses concrete and specific language to develop the author's meaning is “Once More to the Lake” by E. B. White.

This is a transitional sentence telling the reader that we are finished with Woolf's essay and are now going to talk about White's.

In this essay, White explores the passage of time and his attempt to sustain the illusion that things do not change. But he finally accepts the great irony of human existence: It is precisely because the fundamental cycle of birth, childhood, adulthood, and death are unchanging, that he, as a mortal, is subject to this cycle that will lead to in his own passing.

Here the writer notes White's topic and then he states his interpretation of White's main idea.

White uses language rich in concrete and specific detail to illustrate how things can seem to be unchanging.

A topic sentence that says the focus will be on details that show how things do not seem to change.

This shows in his description of the cabin at the lake.

This is a subtopic sentence. It focuses attention to the cabin at the lake.

He says that he “remembered how the bedroom smelled of the lumber it was made of and the wet woods whose scent entered through the screen” (74). When he returned years later with his son, they “would be tired at night and lie down in the accumulated heat of the little bedrooms after the long hot day and the breeze would stir almost imperceptibly outside and the smell of the swamp drifted in through the rusty screens” (77). The concrete language emphasizes the sense of smell and the sense of touch as well as the sense of hearing. White suggests that the cabins, and the feeling of being in them, remain the same.

The paragraph quotes examples of concrete language describing the cabin then and now. The writer states the specific sense appeal of these details.

The last sentence refers back to the idea in the topic sentence that things do not seem to change.

The picture of the lake in his memory was “fade-proof” and was composed of many concrete and specific details.

This is another subtopic sentence under the general topic of “things seem the same. “

He remembers the cottages with “their tiny docks with the flagpole and the American flag floating against the white clouds in the blue sky, and little paths over the roots of the trees leading from camp to camp and the paths leading back to the outhouses and the can of lime for sprinkling, and the souvenir counters at the store the miniature birch-bark canoes and the postcards that showed things looking a little better than they looked” (76). In these lines, White gives an almost Whitman-like catalog of concrete details that convey the ambience of this rural retreat.

This is a long quotation. If it had been any longer, it would need to be put in a separate, indented paragraph. Long quotations should be the exception. The reason this one is included is that it is all one sentence and includes a listing of concrete and specific details. The last sentence tells why the writer thinks the quotation is important. The poet, Walt Whitman, was known for the use of such lists in his poems.

In addition to listing details, White also uses the technique of giving a general term and then following it with more specific examples.

This is a transitional sentence. The long sentence quoted in the paragraph above illustrates one method of using concrete and specific language; now the writer wants to point out another technique that White employs.

For instance, he says that at the farmhouse where they ate, “There was a choice of pie for dessert, and one was blueberry and one was apple . . . .” (76). Again he says, “I would be in the middle of some simple act, I would be picking up a bait box or laying down a table fork . . . “ when he would suddenly have the sensation that he was his father, the actions being so familiar. So White does not just say that there was pie for desert and leave it at that; he names the kinds of pies. Likewise, he illustrates what he means by the general term “simple act” by giving examples.

The writer quotes examples. The last two sentences point out what is special about these examples.

To conclude the essay, White gives the concrete detail which leads to his realization that things are not the same, and that because time passes, he will grow old and die.

This is a topic sentence. It says the writer is going to focus on an important example of concrete language and that this example will conclude his discussion of White's essay.

After a rainstorm, his young son takes a cold, wet swimsuit from the line, and as he pulls it on, White sees him “wince slightly as he pulled [the suit] up around his vitals” (78). This reminds him of unchanging cycle of procreation, life, and death that circumscribes the limits of mortal existence. He sees that he is neither his father nor his son, but a separate individual following his own cycle of mortality.

The important example of concrete language is quoted. The second sentence relates it to the topic of the essay and together with the third sentence, restates White's main idea.

The third example of an essay that illustrates concrete and specific language is George Orwell's “A Hanging.”

This is a transitional sentence. We are finished with White and are going to talk about Orwell.

Orwell's thesis is that capital punishment is wrong, and he makes his position clear not only through explicit statement but also through his vivid description of an execution.

The writer states his interpretation of Orwell's meaning and indicates that Orwell uses concrete and specific language to illustrate his idea.

In telling the story, Orwell gives precise, vivid descriptions of the characters.

This is a topic sentence.

He begins with the victim.

This is a subtopic sentence.

He “was a Hindu, a puny wisp of a man, with a shaven head and vague liquid eyes. He had a thick, sprouting moustache, absurdly too big for his body . . . . “ (3). The concrete language does not present the picture of a dangerous criminal since he is only “a puny wisp of a man” with a moustache, “absurdly too big for his body,” giving him a comical appearance.

The writer quotes examples of concrete description and comments on them.

The officials charged with carrying out the execution are also pictured in a few deft sentences.

This is a subtopic focusing on officials.

The superintendent of the jail is “an army doctor, with a gray toothbrush moustache and a gruff voice” (3). He stood apart from the rest of the other people, “moodily prodding the gravel with his stick” (3). The head jailer is a man with dark skin, “a fat Dravidian in a white drill suit and gold spectacles” (3). And then there is “the hangman, a gray-haired convict in the white uniform of the prison” who greets the superintendent and the others “with a servile crouch” (4). The concrete language focuses on critical details of each man's appearance and helps us create a mental picture. Contrasting portraits emerge of authoritarian English superiors and fawning native inferiors, all uncomfortable participants in the execution.

This paragraph quotes descriptions of the prison officials. The last sentence relates the portraits of the characters to the main idea of Orwell's essay: Capital punishment is wrong.

The “large wholly dog, half Airedale, half pariah” that intrudes on the hanging party provides a sharp contrast to the abstracted resignation of the prisoner and the nervous tension of the prison officials (3).

This is a transitional sentence and a topic sentence that shifts focus from the human characters to the dog.

It is a foil for these characters and represents the unrestrained joy of being alive. Orwell says that “It came bounding among us with a loud volley of barks, and leapt round us wagging its whole body, wild with glee . . . . For a moment it pranced round us” and “made a dash for the prisoner, and jumping up tried to lick his face” (3-4). When one of the men tried to catch it, the dog “danced and gamboled just out of reach” and when stones were thrown at it, the dog “dodged the stones” (4). Here the concrete language does not focus on the appearance of the dog but on its actions. Orwell uses strong action verbs, “leapt,” “pranced,” “danced,” “gamboled,” and “dodged,” as well as the participles “bounding,” “wagging,” and “jumping” to convey the dog's vitality. The picture of the dog, symbolizing the irrepressible joy of being alive, provides an implicit condemnation of the execution that is about to take place.

This paragraph again quotes examples of concrete description and comments on them. The last sentence relates the description to the Orwell's main idea.

The value of concrete and specific language is that it creates vivid pictures for the reader and conveys information in a precise and unambiguous way. Concrete and specific language should never be merely decorative, added as an afterthought to enhance what might otherwise be dull or uninteresting. The more important a topic is for a writer, the more words he devotes to it, and rather than repeating the same generalizations, he provides more details. Details can only be conveyed by concrete and specific language.

This is the conclusion. The writer emphasizes the importance of concrete and specific language in good writing.

WORKS CITED

The entry above follows model 21 in The Little Brown Handbook. This model is for a reference work. The word that you look up in the dictionary is treated as the title of an article.

Buscemi, Santi V. and Charlotte Smith. 75 Readings Plus. 6th ed. Boston: McGraw Hill.

See model 19.

The entry above follows the model for a work by one author and includes the information that it is an edition other than the first. See models 1 and 11.

Orwell, George. "A Hanging." Buscemi and Smith. 2-6.

"Specific." The American Heritage College Dictionary. 3rd. ed. 1993.

White, E. B. "Once More to the Lake." Buscemi and Smith. 73-78.

Woolf, Virginia. "The Death of the Moth." Buscemi and Smith. 57-59.

See model 19 for the essays in your anthology.